i'm kinda confused right now although i seriously should be very happy. cos finally, wilfred have goals he wanna acheive in life and i ought to be glad as all that i've tried paid off well and finally i hear personally from him that he wants not only to get an O level certification during his NS but also to go to a poly after his NS. (it's possible) he regret for getting out of sch when he wasn't supposed and ready to and got into working life when he shouldn't be and ain't prepared for. so now he wanna earn them back. finally he have the drive to move on with his life and we're gonna have a different experience in our relationship even when he's in NS because till then i'll be on attachment and we'll both be paid and more able to do things and what we'll be doing will create more memories and fun than now. hopefully, life would be better. you may then think i should be damn thrilled about it. yes i am, but then again, i'll be so damn old when he's out of poly. cos i ain't younger than him and by the time he's out of poly (if possible) he'll be ard 25 years of age and me? a year older of course. that's like soooooo old and guys of that age should already more or less have a stable sort of job but he'll onli be a freshie. it gives me the jitters and i can't help but feel edgy about it... and i'm kinda prejudice abt late marriages especially after 28 for some strange reason. i may be thinking too far right now but it's gd to plan ahead. that's my habit anyway, to prepare for the worst.

btw, tml onwards i'll be taking out my starhub maxonline to return so dat i can cancel my line and activate my broadband on wednesday which means i can't access to the internet for three days! i'm gonna die..... hahaha...feel like a comp geek now. my hotmail is gonna be so so so damn overloaded. i'll be going dwn to MUJI tml to get the organizer to re-write my accounts tml. that old bk's pages are already fallin out. darn.